When I feel worn out, I get existential

I look forward and back.  Trying to see the road which I went on to that was a wrong turn.  I am happy with the place where I am now,  and I am finally with the love of my life.  What happened in my past that made me lose track of my potential,  and what has changed?  From my perspective,  I am still the same man I always have been. The boy who turned out okay,  and never really became what I should have.  What can I do to change it?

When faced with the ultimate end of life

I often find that the people who I know are only in my life for a finite amount of time.  I have no idea how long people will stay in it,  nor do I know when they will leave.  When confronted with the inevitable result of the time we can spend with each other,  the best thing I can say is hold on to your closest friends and family members and everyone else is circumstantial. Hey,  the best is yet to come,  and focus on those who make you feel your best.

i feel like I am not worth anyones time.

At times I worry about everything and everyone.  I try to make my life a semblence of normal,  and I am reminded daily that normal is not my way.  I am not sad, nor angry.  I am tired.  Tired of hearing excuse after excuse.  That is just how it is I guess.