Regrets

Everything that I have done, made me who I am today.  For better, or worse. Yet for some reason,  I struggle.  Regrets, what ifs, questions, and screams of oversthinking, due to insecurities.  I often find myself stuck on small details, that most other people do not pay attention too. The more I struggle, the more I feel like a turtle stuck on his back. I try to right myself. No luck.  All of these thing's,  lead to one specific thing.  Why? Is there something wrong with me?

Quality of life

Is a term that I'm sure most other people who are diagnosed with MS understand all too well.
I feel that it is an utter and complete lie. I am still plugging away,  trying to fix the problem,  and turn my self destructive immune system back to normal.
As we are discussing lies, why does my mind keep thinking about all of the lies and loss I've endured over the years, and in turn paints them to be truth.  I wish I could figure out what and why.