succumbing to fear

Not a day goes by,  where I am reminded of why fear has consistently encircled my life.  

I fear that I will wake tomorrow morning and be unable to walk.  

I fear that my heart is too damaged. My soul too ripped and torn asunder. My brain is too dilapidated. 

I fear that my life is a waste of time for anyone who attempts to help me. 

I fear that no matter how hard I try. I will inevitably face my pain on my own. 

I fear, that due to past issues,  even though I say we, the "I" in every person will beat out my feeble crys for assistance. 

These are all bits and pieces of the damage that has been done to me in the past.  A past that I was never given a choice. That even though I was trying everything I could to fix,  needed to fix itself first. 

So all I can do is keep pushing forward.  Not only because of me.  So I can make this life better for my little bear.  This saviour bear will repair the world,  and my  past damage.